This is my favorite movie ever. I´m not sure what that says about me, except that I have a deep abiding faith that love is both wonderful and possible.
Some people might interpret this movie as Lee becoming a woman only through her relationship with Edward, which happens to be sexual and romantic in nature. The fact that she's the submissive in their sado-masochistic pairing might raise additional eyebrows. At first glance, this is not a very female friendly movie and it paints Lee in a rather bad light of needing a man in order to be happy. I happen to believe that there's something deeper going on.
Lee (Maggie Gyllenhaal) isn´t perfect. She is profoundly and deeply scarred, both emotionally and physically. She is contained, as Edward says, ¨closed." She is still a child in many ways as demonstrated by her purple bedroom and canopy bed. Even her cutting kit is beribboned and the first implement we see her use against herself is the sharpened foot of a ballerina. She liked the constriction of the insitution she was in and she wants to be a secretary, to have boring work. She began cutting in seventh grade, and she's still trapped there, at that point in time, unable to move forward into a more complicated and terrifying adult life. Lee is a caricature of us all and yet the movie doesn't treat the extrimity of her character lightly. It doesn't make fun of her.
Alternatively, Edward (a remarkable James Spader) is a hyper-adult, exerting as much control as possible over his rather solitary life. When he meets Lee, she challenges him. For the first time in her life, she is attempting to exert control over something other than herself. He gives her permission to be powerful, something that was obviously lacking in her relationships with her family.
Their interaction does have an important sexual component, and most people get caught up in that. It's a movie about sado-masochism, bondage, etc., but I see something different. The movie is about two people who accept each other and love each other in a way that works for them.
It's also about being brave enough to choose something different. Because Lee is the "submissive," Edward feels like he's taking advantage of her, and it's only once she asserts her will during her hunger strike that it becomes clear to him that their relationship is what she wants, what she needs. By agreeing to be "submissive," Lee has actually taken responsibility for what she needs and wants and has accepted it. Through her hunger strike, she demands respect and acceptance of her choices from those who love her. As she narrates during the strike, she has always suffered, but through her relationship with Edward, she is no longer afraid of suffering. She has finally accepted herself and being with Edward makes her feel validated, as worthy of love and care as anyone else.
At the end of the movie, she places a dead roach on their freshly made bed and looks directly at the camera as Edward goes off to work. It's evident that despite what some people might think about the type of relationship she and Edward have, she clearly holds a good bit of power.
I find this movie exultant. It provides hope that if one declares themselves worthy of love, no matter what their flaws or conditions, it is possible to find someone who they can love and who will love them back.
Some people might interpret this movie as Lee becoming a woman only through her relationship with Edward, which happens to be sexual and romantic in nature. The fact that she's the submissive in their sado-masochistic pairing might raise additional eyebrows. At first glance, this is not a very female friendly movie and it paints Lee in a rather bad light of needing a man in order to be happy. I happen to believe that there's something deeper going on.
Lee (Maggie Gyllenhaal) isn´t perfect. She is profoundly and deeply scarred, both emotionally and physically. She is contained, as Edward says, ¨closed." She is still a child in many ways as demonstrated by her purple bedroom and canopy bed. Even her cutting kit is beribboned and the first implement we see her use against herself is the sharpened foot of a ballerina. She liked the constriction of the insitution she was in and she wants to be a secretary, to have boring work. She began cutting in seventh grade, and she's still trapped there, at that point in time, unable to move forward into a more complicated and terrifying adult life. Lee is a caricature of us all and yet the movie doesn't treat the extrimity of her character lightly. It doesn't make fun of her.
Alternatively, Edward (a remarkable James Spader) is a hyper-adult, exerting as much control as possible over his rather solitary life. When he meets Lee, she challenges him. For the first time in her life, she is attempting to exert control over something other than herself. He gives her permission to be powerful, something that was obviously lacking in her relationships with her family.
Their interaction does have an important sexual component, and most people get caught up in that. It's a movie about sado-masochism, bondage, etc., but I see something different. The movie is about two people who accept each other and love each other in a way that works for them.
It's also about being brave enough to choose something different. Because Lee is the "submissive," Edward feels like he's taking advantage of her, and it's only once she asserts her will during her hunger strike that it becomes clear to him that their relationship is what she wants, what she needs. By agreeing to be "submissive," Lee has actually taken responsibility for what she needs and wants and has accepted it. Through her hunger strike, she demands respect and acceptance of her choices from those who love her. As she narrates during the strike, she has always suffered, but through her relationship with Edward, she is no longer afraid of suffering. She has finally accepted herself and being with Edward makes her feel validated, as worthy of love and care as anyone else.
At the end of the movie, she places a dead roach on their freshly made bed and looks directly at the camera as Edward goes off to work. It's evident that despite what some people might think about the type of relationship she and Edward have, she clearly holds a good bit of power.
I find this movie exultant. It provides hope that if one declares themselves worthy of love, no matter what their flaws or conditions, it is possible to find someone who they can love and who will love them back.
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